I have spent most of this pregnancy dealing with fear and anxiety. The beginning was uncertain, the middle has been uncertain, and what's ahead is definitely uncertain. We are facing more tests a week from Monday, and some moments I have found myself nearly paralyzed with fear of what the future holds.
This past week, I read these words in my Jesus Calling devotional:
"Rehearsing your troubles results in experiencing them many times, whereas you are meant to go through them only when they actually occur. Do not multiply your suffering in this way! Instead, come to Me, and relax in My Peace. I will strengthen you and prepare you for this day, transforming your fear into confident trust."
How I needed that message. Rehearsing my troubles is exactly what I've been doing. Trying to guess at the answers, pondering the what-ifs, worrying over it all. I've been living with a spirit of fear, yet I am told in I Timothy 1:7 that "God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." I am also reminded of Isaiah 26:3, which says "You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you." Help me, Lord, to trust in You and not give in to fear and worry.
I will plan to post another update in a couple weeks. We are so grateful for your thoughts and prayers during this time!
A note about photos: Bless those of you who thought Tuesday's picture was an actual shot of my pantry, but it's just a nice picture I found on-line. The above picture, however, is definitely me, sending a little love to our baby girl.